alis volat propriis : ad meliora

me as of july 21st, 2010

2010-07-21T05:06:00.001-04:00

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

too many times I've been wrong, I guess being right takes too long

2010-05-10T19:58:00.002-04:00

I feel like a bad friend and I know that I'm trying the best I can, but I feel like I'm never enough for certain people.
I feel like I'll never be enough and that my best won't ever be enough no matter how hard I try.

And I'm sorry. But then again, I'm not. I can't be what you want me to be in time or what you need me to be right away. Patience is key and maybe that's what you need. I'm not going to change my whole being just for you and I'm sorry for that, but am not as well.

If I'm not enough, then that's too bad. I don't know what more you want from me, but I know this...

I'm losing you and it's effortless.

and I'm not gonna stop cause you're the only one I want

2010-04-29T16:13:00.003-04:00

when you want something, if you really want it bad enough, limitations no longer exist. those lines that you used to see, those lines that you were told not to cross, those lines that you could not cross... they no longer exist. boundaries no longer exist. if you want something bad enough, so bad that your heart is calling for it and starving for it, nothing should be able to stop you.

persistance, determination, motivation and inspiration. drive and courage. it all comes out of you when something you want is in focus. something that you have a desire and passion for. nothing should get in the way of you and that one thing, whether it be a goal you want to achieve, a person that you want to be with, something that you can't live without.

but one of the most important things is when you have the drive and courage to get a person that you, not just want, but need. it's when you have that string that just keeps pulling you toward them, and that push from within your heart that tells you to go after them. it all kicks in when you know that you need him because he makes you a better person. you know that you need him because when he's around, you can't help but smile. you know that you need him because when you're with him, your heart is always happy, and you can see it in your own eyes.

you know that you want him just because he makes you feel something special inside, and you want to hold onto that feeling forever. you know that you want him because whenever he smiles, you smile and every little word he says seems to be the perfect thing to hear. you know that you want him when your friends and the people you love notice a change in you, a better change, and realize that maybe this boy could be your better half, the only one that has made you this genuinely happy in a while.

wants and needs are different but when it comes to that one thing that you want and need to get in life, wants and needs almost become the same thing. they become important. limitations and boundaries also become the same thing. they become nonexistent.

- mdt

Rest In Paradise

2010-02-13T15:01:00.002-05:00

This week was a sad, sad week for the fashion industry and also for the Olympics.

First, the news came about around two-three days ago about Lee Alexander McQueen commiting suicide, and then it was confirmed that he was dead.

Alexander McQueen was, in my eyes, a legend in the fashion industry. They're assuming that he took his own life because he was having a hard time dealing with the death of his mother, which happened about a week before his own death.

Alexander McQueen was an extraordinary designer who thought outside of the box and broke all the 'rules' of fashion. Hiring disabled, large and unusual models for his runway shows, designing over the top clothes with basically perfect tailoring and having the signature skull print on scarves and such, Alexander McQueen definitely made his mark in fashion.

Rest in paradise, Alexander McQueen.

-

Tragic event after tragic event. Vancouver's 2010 Winter Olympics opened yesterday, but Nordar Kumaritashvili died in a luge accident while practicing for the Olympic Winter Games. If any of you have seen the video, it honestly made me turn away and tear up. It's so hard to watch. Nordar was so young and now he can't live his dream, or even compete in the Olympics.

Rest in peace, Nordar.

Love.

2010-01-25T22:48:00.001-05:00

" Love is a funny thing. You expect it to be easy. You expect it to be a world of roses and laughs and perfect moments that you find only in movies. You expect her to always say the right thing, and always know exactly how you feel, or exactly how to react to it. You expect her to calm you down when you're yelling or to chase you when you run away. You expect so much that you feel entirely, and utterly defeated when something doesn't exactly match up with all your plans.

But that's the thing. Love isn't a plan. It doesn't have a certain beginning and it certainly has no end or visible finish line to those deeply in it. Love happens; it is so incredibly messy. People around you can't comprehend why you do the things you do, or why you fight so hard for something that seems to cause you so much pain, because simply, they can't see. They can't see the invisible ring of insanity that surrounds you when you're in love.

It's inconvenient and painful and devastating at times, but we can't live without it. What you don't learn is how hard love is. How much work it takes. How much of ourselves we have to put into it. How it isn't worth it until we are complete and utter idiots about it. Love isn't her calming you down when you yell. It's her yelling, just as loud, just as hard, right back at you, right in your face to wake you up and to keep you grounded. It isn't her/him bringing you roses everyday or cute things that make your relationship appear more presentable.

It's after a long fight, that drains the life and bones right out of you both, and yet her showing up at your door the next morning anyway. It's not her saying all the right things or knowing exactly how to handle you. So no, it's not her caressing your hair and telling you everything is going to be alright. It's her standing there, admitting she's just as scared as you are. You have to remember that with love, you're not the only one involved. You've unknowingly put your life, your heart into the palms of another persons hands and said, here. Do what you will. Mash it into a million pieces. Or forget I ever handed it to you in the first place, just as long as you have it.

It makes us crazy. It makes reality invisible and it erases all the lines that we shouldn't cross. Because love isn't about fencing ourselves in; feeling safe, feeling sure about the future. It's about scaring the shit out of every nerve in our body, but pushing forward anyway. Because all the fighting and all the tears and all the uncertainty is worth it. And it's a hell of a lot better, than being 100% happy without someone to show us that there is a world of a difference between feeling 'happy' and feeling whole. "

- Andrew Landon

one step at a time.

2009-12-26T20:27:00.002-05:00

you don't love her.

for crying out loud, you haven't been dating the girl for more than what, twenty four hours? so hell no, you don't fucking love her.

you like her. and you've liked her for what, a total of two weeks or something? more or less, who knows, because you don't tell me these things anymore.

so what, i'm quick to judge. who wouldn't judge a relationship that's only lasted about a day and the partners are already saying 'i love you' to each other when they didn't even know each other really existed until about, oh, i don't know, three weeks ago?

you've known each other for four months. i get it. you've liked her for a week or two. i get it. you made your relationship official on christmas day. i get it. and you love her. i don't get it.

whatever, your heart feels what it feels but this, my friend, isn't love. this is what i hate about relationships and why i can understand so many older people call teenagers immature and incapable of being in 'true love' or relationships. because there are certain people who just blurt out 'i love you' for the sake of having something to say, of having something to prove that the relationship is working and going somewhere and will continue to go somewhere.

you can last a whole month without those three words slipping out of your month, i'll tell you that.

don't say it if you don't mean it. you might think you do, but you just like her. a lot. and this whole 'i love her' thing isn't flying. i'm not getting my head around it just yet because you know what? it doesn't make sense to me.

and sure, i sound harsh and i sound like a fucking bitch and i sound judgmental as hell. well, maybe because i am. i'm your best friend, i'm not your fucking shrink. i'm your reality check when you need it. i tell you my opinion when you ask for it. i give you advice when you want it.

i'm not your maid or your fucking mistress who's going to pat you on the back and hand you tissues. though that sounds like the perfect best friend, it isn't. i'm just trying to understand you right now because i haven't been understanding you for the past three weeks.

i know everything last. i find out everything from unimportant and irrelevant resources. i only find out from you once i ask you.

and this might sound hypocritical because of my last post, but these things are really nothing to hide because we see each other almost everyday and you know i'm bound to find out. and if one day, something horrible travels around and i hear word of it from another unimportant and irrelevant source, i really don't know what i'll do.

so yeah, i don't get it. i don't get you right now.

that's all.

live and breath everyday.

2009-12-26T02:53:00.001-05:00

To let go isn’t to forget, not to think about, or ignore. It doesn’t leave feelings of anger, jealousy, or regret. Letting go isn’t about winning or losing. It’s not about pride and it’s not about how you appear, and it’s not obsessing or dwelling on the past. Letting go isn’t blocking memories or thinking sad thoughts, and doesn’t leave emptiness, hurt, or sadness. It’s not about giving in or giving up. Letting go isn’t about loss and it’s not about defeat. To let go is to cherish the memories, but to overcome and move on. It is having an open mind & confidence in the future. Letting go is learning and experiencing and growing. To let go is to be thankful for the experiences that made you laugh, made you cry, and made you grow. It’s about all that you have, all that you had, and all that you will soon gain. Letting go is having the courage to accept change, and the strength to keep moving. Letting go is growing up. It is realizing that the heart can sometimes be the most potent remedy. To let go is to open a door, and to clear a path and set yourself free.

closest friends get estranged when the status change

2009-12-23T19:40:00.002-05:00

"thought i knew you for a minute, now i'm not so sure
so here's to everything coming down to nothing
here's to silence that cuts me to the core
where is this going ? thought i knew for a minute but i don't anymore"

i'm not gonna apologize for doing something that i don't regret doing.
just because it doesn't exactly go on your 'bucket list', or look right in your eyes, i'm not going to apologize for doing it.
things change and people grow up. i wasn't exactly looking to try something new, especially that, and i wasn't going out of my way to get it.
it was an opportunity that came up and you know what? yeah, i never thought i would. but i did. and i don't really give a fuck that it happened because you know what? what's done is done, it's in the past and i already did it.

i'm sorry that i didn't tell you earlier. you weren't exactly the first person i wanted to tell because i knew this was how you were gonna react.
and you know, i didn't tell very many people because i didn't think it was a big deal. at least where i'm growing up, the school i'm in, nobody really botehrs to give two fucks.
it's something you come across and something that you're gonna be around and that maybe something you won't be able to understand because of your school and your new friends.
i told you when i was ready, and i didn't think you'd take it as bad as you did. people might think that your reaction isn't as bad compared to others, but you're the only one who talked to me after in such a degrading way.

i haven't changed. that one thing doesn't affect me as a whole. it doesn't suddenly shape my whole personality, being and life.
just because you didn't expect it from me, cause hell, i didn't expect it from myself either, that doesn't mean that i'm all of a sudden a new person that you're better than.
damn, it'd be one sad world if all the people who haven't tried it looked down on the people who have.
i'm not the stereotype, so don't label me or talk to me like i am. once, twice, sure but i know my limits and i'm not going to fuck up my life, so please don't act like i already have.

you're lucky that i even told you, because i haven't even told one of the very best friends i have. and i'm sure he deserves to know more than you do, and i'm sure that he'll take it way easier than you did.
you're supposed to be my best friend. you don't know how highly i talk of you. and now i feel like, slowly but surely, things are changing.
i'm trying so fucking hard to keep it the way it is or was at least because i don't want to go through this again. i've been through it one too many times and i know i should be used to it by now, but i won't be.
who the fuck is used to their best friend leaving? or going? or not being there anymore?

it isn't my thing, so don't look at me and talk to me and think about only that.
i want you to look at me and talk to me like i'm your best friend.

i'd highly appreciate that.

infinite silence.

2009-12-21T20:34:00.000-05:00

but i guess things change
it's funny how someone else's success brings pain.

thursday, december 3rd, 2009 ... :)

2009-12-03T21:52:00.003-05:00

personal entry.

practice tires me out. she made us run a lot, but i guess that's silveira for you, right? we didn't win the game but i wasn't upset... in a sense, i guess, because that team was shit, definitely. but she made us work on blocking and running from net position to free ball position is quite hard. she wants us there faster and faster each time. then after volleyball, i have phys ed, and today we went to the weight room. i'm pretty sliiiick, i won't lie. but i got so tired when i was going to art, i wanted to fall asleep. and i almost did. perspective, really? i learned that in grade four but she makes it seem so hard. it's due tomorrow but i didn't even do anything except for the border. i still need to hand in my choice painting, haha.

lunch wasn't bad. stayed with the girls for a bit then found cassie, and we stole robby's cookie. we finally got christian's attention and when he left to go see us, joey and ian and paul came around. talked for a little while like always till joey left with her, hahahaha. and ian left with paul. then andrew came over. "oh no" loool. then group hug and we left for thirrrd. fourth was pretty boring but i'm doing better in fourth now. i guess i'm trying to focus. an essay worth 95 marks in total, so fml, gonna work hard on that one.

afterschooooool... haha, live! stayed with cassie to watch the basketball game but first we went to her house. changed into her sweats and headed over to pizzapizza for a slice. after that, we walked back to martins and then watched the game. it was pretty fun actually. talking to christian and james and jahmar and diego. lmfao cassie, bob and chung lee/catherine and michelle. ohhhhh dear. after that senior game, we talked to alex mcfarlane (yes ciarra!) and hung out there for a while. me and cassie went to watch a little bit of the junior game but not too much... they were beating them anyway.

saw frank, talked to him for a while, and then didn't wanna walk home alone to cassie's house. we got kwasi to walk with us since he goes that way. stayed until half and then we walked home with kwasi, stewie, james and justin. lmfao kwasi, realtalkssss... i am serious. don't even lie, that was a serious issue i talked about. then he started talking about 'cloudy with a chance of meatballs' and how hungry these guys were. oh dear.

then stayed at cassie's house for a while, stayed for dinner and played around with jacob. had some realtalks ;) i love her off. ♥

hopefully tomorrow's a good day ?

/personal entry.

i wish that you'd come crash into me

2009-11-17T21:57:00.002-05:00

every girl deserves the best.

every girl deserves a man who's going to be there for her at her best and at her worst. they deserve a real man who's going to put her first, not second or third or last. they deserve a man who knows what's best for her, and what's best for him, and puts things into perspective. every girl deserves a real man. a real, honest to God, man.

and why they are so hard to find these days, God only knows why. but what i know is that you shouldn't put up with the bullshit or the lies or the fakes walking around. every single piece of bullshit, every single lie and every single fake emotion, feeling and word he speaks and feels and expresses and feeds you - you don't deserve any of it.

get up and leave. don't stress the small. boys are just boys. find them anywhere.

i'm tired of seeing heartbreaks and stressed people and i'm tired of telling my own friends that he isn't worth the pain or the heartbreak, he isn't worth the trouble or the time. and i'm tired of being unacknowledged and ignored, and i'm tired of seeing that same friend go through the same pain, heartbreak, trouble and wasting time with the same waste boy.

you don't deserve bullshit. you are worth so much more.

don't waste time listening to him say 'i love you' when you know that it's meaningless. don't waste time forgiving him everytime he comes crawling back to you because he knows you're whipped. don't waste time telling him 'i love you' when you know you're just another one on his list of things to do. don't waste time trying to get him to change because you can't force change on somebody who doesn't want it.

he's not going to become a better person because of you. as harsh as it sounds, you aren't the reason for his better doings. unless he wants it for himself and for good intentions, he won't change because of you or for you. he wants to do good because he wants to get to you and wants to get in you. get it straight or don't get it at all.

boys like these are easy to find yet they're so hard to pick out. i'm not saying that there are no good men out there, but it's not like they're flashing and you could just pick them out and have them for yourself.

take your time when you're young. your heart is naive and vulnerable and when you come crashing down, best believe that he isn't going to be there to help you get back up and pick up the pieces of your broken heart.

i don't want to tell those same friends and give them advice when they're not going to listen to me. i don't want to watch you fall apart again only to have you go crawling back to him. i don't want to be the one putting your broken heart together because, as much as it sounds like something a good friend would do, i shouldn't have to be doing it in the first place.

you should know you deserve better than some asshole who walks around pretending he feels something for you, when all he feels is his manhood going hard.

please know that you deserve much more and that you are worth so much more, and i don't want to see you crying again.

sing me to sleep tonight.

2009-11-16T23:19:00.003-05:00

boys will be boys, girls will be girls.

this means that boys will get over things with time, but it always seems to be less time than girls. this means that girls will overreact and blow things out of proportion. this means that boys will be into sports, cars, and things that girls won't be into. this means that girls will be into makeup, shopping and things that boys won't be into.

but this doesn't mean that you can't get past it and build a strong relationship with one another.

i'm thankful for the few boys in my life that i always can seem to count on, regardless. the friends in my life that are girls, i can trust them with my life, but it's easier to acknowledge them and it's easier to thank them everyday and say 'i love you' and mean it with ease.

but the boys in my life can't go unnoticed. for some reason, they've probably affected me more and have been more reliable than some of the people in my life. especially my best friend, my brother and my other half.

i have to thank him, and today i realized how much he has done for me, even if just subconsciously. he has been there for me through every problem and every down i've ever experienced. he's been there to listen, although sometimes not very well, and has been there to watch me grow and learn from my mistakes.

he lets me make them, and he lets me learn, and he lets me get back up on my feet to be a better person. he has been there through all my faults and has accepted all my flaws and he has been there through all the happiness and has shared them with me.

i know that we'll be friends for a while, and hopefully for the rest of my lifetime and i know that he's the one friend i can count on no matter what, and nothing can truly tear us apart, and nobody can tear us apart.

he deserves more credit than i am giving, and he deserves more attention than i am giving, so here's to you. you're basically my family, and i call you my brother, and even though we're only three and a half months in this new part of our lives, i can't thank you enough for always being there. i prayed that i would never lose you, and i'm glad that i haven't and i plan on keeping it that way. you might not know how much you mean to me, but i know how much you mean to me and i hope that one day you realize how grateful i am to have you in my life.

you've done nothing but be kind and be an amazing friend, and for some odd reason, i feel like no matter what happens, we'll always stay friends. thank you, brother, for everything you've done and i'm sure i'll continue to thank you for the things you'll be doing. i have your back through thick and thin. i promise you this.

i guess high school helps me realize a lot of things, and it also helped me realize who my true friends are. we've overcome a lot through our friendship, and three months in and you've never hesitated to help me through this experience. thanks a bunch. i'll always be here for you like you've been there for me.

♥

i'm only gonna play the fool one time.

2009-11-10T19:53:00.003-05:00

one low blow after another. and the cycle just repeats and repeats.

first, i find out things from people. numerous messages here and there from people that are close to me, people that i'm not that close to and random people, some i don't even know. "did you hear about so and so?" yes, i heard. and i want you to stop reminding me.

second, i find out something that i wasn't exactly searching for. it was accidental, but it was something that somehow meant so much to me. i thought i wasn't serious about you, but i guess i am or at least was. or at least i was getting there. i don't even know anymore.

third, not even a day after the second disappointing thing, i am once again reminded, but this time it's harsh. it's official. it's harsh and it's official and it may be my last reminder, but you know that it's torture when i see you walking around. walking around, with that person, and walking around doing those things.

i get reminded all the time. i get reminded that it's never enough.

that i'm never enough.

and it's difficult to live seeing those people that bring you those reminders every single day. it's difficult to know that the person they enjoy being around and with so much could have been you, if you did this or if you did that.

or if you were them.

and it's difficult to get a reminder every single day that you're not enough. it's difficult to get a subliminal reminder that what you're doing and who you are - it's not enough and never will be.

it may be done subconsciously, but it hurts all the same.

it hurts all the same to know that you're just never going to be enough.

my heartbeat is growing weak.

2009-11-08T00:10:00.003-05:00

the last time i said that i didn't need you and that i was through with you apparently wasn't the last time. but i promise you that i realized some things over the past few weeks that made me see the person you truly are, and i swear to God, this is the last time.

i don't need you in my life. whatever made me think different in the past is making me think that i was clearly blind and dumb then. to honestly believe that i was trying and trying for a good thing is stupid, because i know now that you aren't a good thing. you're not worth my time. you're definitely just not worth it.

you are far from a good person. you are far from something worthy. you are far from something that i need in my life. and if it's taken me this long to realize that, then so be it. i'm just glad that i've finally realized.

i've tried to see the good in you for so long. i've tried to push all the flaws aside, knowing that i have my own as well, and i've tried to get over all the problems that we've been through. i got over them. i overlooked all the mistakes and wrongs. i tried harder each time that we fell through and fell apart. now, i just can't keep trying.

i'm not gonna put in so much effort into something that you don't want to work. i can't see past all the flaws anymore because they're just getting bigger and bigger. there is no more good you. i try so hard to find it but there's just none. and i see now that there was never any to begin with. i realize now that i was lying to myself in the past, probably just wanting an excuse to not be a bad person and leave you.

but you know what, i don't even care anymore. the realest sticks around and they show their true selves when you enter a whole new environment, a whole new place in your life. once we entered high school, it became different. with everyone, of course, but i won't be able to handle and tolerate you anymore. the realest sticks around, yeah, but the fakes shine through. it becomes obvious.

so i'm done wasting time. i'm done trying to be somebody i won't be. i'm done trying to please you and others. it isn't worth it. it never was anyway. i'm just done.

and i hope you realize this. i hope you realize what you've done to me and other people, and what you're still doing to me and other people. i hope you realize it and i hope it sends you on a big guilt trip.

once you realize it, i hope you see that you're no longer do it to me. you can continue to do it to others, but i'm done being part of that crowd. and once you realize it, don't turn around and expect me to listen to you and try to help you out and 'have your back'.

i've walked out on you for the final time. you've already walked out on me, anyway.

life

2009-10-20T22:08:00.001-04:00

is hard. Oh well.

You deal with it.

you're a jerk, i know

2009-09-27T19:53:00.002-04:00

Ego is so big, it is consuming the poor boy.

Isn't it funny when that happens? Like what a waste. You're not even that *great* so maybe you can stop being such a fucking drama queen, eh? Thinking you're badass and shit... whoosh, you are a pretty big disgrace.

Moving on from stupid shit,

today was a good day. I love my new best friend, Fralvin. Thanks Abby and Sean ♥

Tomorrow is the big day!

do me a favor, call me jerk one more time.

2009-09-23T22:50:00.003-04:00

Do I deserve it? Meh, maybe. But please don't use me. And I'm not saying I'm some sort of angel but compared to a few people around here, I'll admit that I'm nice. I'm pretty honest. I'm pretty loyal. So don't take advantage of it, because that's fucked up. And just because I am nice, doesn't mean I won't go back and fuck you over as a thank you for fucking me over.

That isn't a threat.

But on the other hand... I think I missed all of the signals you never gave me. There goes my mind again just wishing for something to happen, wishing so hard that I actually think it's happening when it isn't. I'm fucking sorry. I really am.

God, I just feel like breaking down and fucking crying, but I won't let myself. Not this early on in because if I do, how the hell am I gonna survive a whole ten months?

you swear you're the last thing on my mind

2009-09-22T22:29:00.001-04:00

When you pretend and act like nothing has happened, and that nothing is wrong... there is a term for that.

Fake.

Enough is enough. I'm really getting sick and tired of it all.

true friends stab you in the front, so tell me why my back is aching

2009-09-21T20:36:00.002-04:00

It's true what they say.

Your friendships - loyalty, trust, honesty, love - it all gets put to the test once you enter high school. And you know what, sometimes, those friendships end up fading into the background because there isn't enough effort put into it and there isn't enough communication. There just isn't enough. There isn't enough to hold it together, like how it was held together before.

High school pushes you to the limit when it comes to friends. It teaches you lessons after it gives you the test. And it's true when they say that you find out who your true, real friends are in high school, because this is the reality check. High school is the slap in the face.

You realize that people change, sometimes for the worse, and that you might not be able to do anything about it. You realize that people won't stay, even when they promised you that they'd always be there for you. You realize that people will lie to your face and lie behind your back, and the two different sides of them will finally show. You realize that the people you thought were your best friends really aren't. You realize that things fade and end when they do for a reason, and sometimes, letting go is the hardest thing to do. But sometimes, letting go and letting change happen is the only thing saving your life.

Friendships don't last. That's one thing I learned in high school - and I'm only three weeks in.

RULE NUMBER TWENTY SEVEN

2009-09-17T23:00:00.001-04:00

#27: YOU ARE HUMAN.

please don't make things more difficult than they gotta be

2009-09-15T20:27:00.003-04:00

i knew i would see you around. i'm not naive, i'm not stupid, i'm not an idiot. i know that we attend the same school, and it's inevitable. we will, eventually, bump into each other maybe once, twice, more than twice, more than three times, more than four times. and i expected that. i prepared for it. i didn't really care, actually, because i was and i am over you.

but when i see you - once, twice, three times, four times... i believe it's been more than five times already - it isn't just a simple 'hi', 'hello', or a nod or wave or smile. it isn't just like we're both quiet passer by's who would like to get to class. it isn't just silent when we see each other.

it's a 'hey' with a high five. a 'hey' with a 'look at this...'. a 'hey' with a question. a 'hey' with 'how are you?'. a 'hey' with a 'what's new?'. it is a hello, and a conversation. and it lights up sparks in me, like it has always done before. like you have always done before.

and i feel like we're getting back into the same routine again, like a few years ago. and i'm thinking, if i'm over you, why does it matter? why do i care? there is no feeling here. but you can't just suddenly wipe away everything that happened in the past. when you lose somebody - death, or not - they don't fade away in one piece. the pain doesn't heal in one day. you don't suddenly forget them the next day they're gone. it takes time. everything comes back together day by day. but day by day, you start to realize what's really gone, making the healing just that much more painful, that much more longer and that much more slower.

i had only gotten over that a few months ago. and it's all hitting me back, like shit hitting the fan. and it feels good, it does. it feels fine to me. it feels like i'm in a safe zone right now. where you can say hello and strike up a conversation as many times as you'd like, but you will not get to me. i'm still over you.

but i'm afraid that after a while... a little more of this, a little more often... it will get to me. i'm scared that everything i've built up is going to come crashing down on me. i'm scared that you're going to be the one to push that wall and i'm scared of getting hurt again. i won't lie. i am scared of getting hurt again. i don't deserve to be hurt again, and that's what i believe.

part of me wishes you'd leave me alone, but the most of me just wants us to be able to be friends, without restrictions or boundaries. but i know i'm putting most of those restrictions and boundaries up because of my fears. i may be over what happened, i may be over you, but i'm not over all the hurting and the fear.

but i'll be willing to take any chance, any risk with you.

the realest shit you've ever heard.

2009-09-13T20:00:00.003-04:00

it makes me laugh when i read some stuff on people's bios that go a little something like this: "i'm different. i'm unique. i may be [insert age here] but i'm educated. i'm not like every other girl out there, even though you may think so." etc etc and they insert some intelligent ass sounding words here and there to make themselves seem smarter or worth your time, right?

i'm not gonna lie, i used to write shit like that. back when this blogspot never did exist, actually, haha. but i wasn't lying. goddamn, what was i, like eleven, and writing shit like that and i wasn't even lying. but these people, when you meet 'em in real life - they are nothing like you expected. you read the shit they write about themselves, and i understand in our fantasies, we want ourselves to be better and do better and seem better, but shit, you're writing this for the public eye.

and then they meet your fucking whack ass and are so hella disappointed. i'm not going to boost on my profile. i'm not. i re-did it but that's how you'll see me if you ever meet me in real life. i'm not gonna talk as if i have the world's biggest vocab, because i know for a fact that i do not, but i also know that i have a bigger vocab than you do and the shit you write in your stupid ass bio is so disappointing because it ain't true. it's a wall. it's what you put off to be over the what, the inter-friggin'-net?

this post was only written because i was scanning through all these blogspots that people have, you know, because apparently it's popular now in our little area, and EVERY FUCKIN' BIO SAYS THE SAME SHIT. what are you all, getting tips from each other? i bet i'm going to get shot tomorrow morning once i step out but oh well. hop off each other's swag, please? you're not 'real' if you're biting off somebody else. last i heard, that's called being a poser. fake. poser. fake. poser. fake. poser.

oh and quit flooding my home page on facebook with waste shit like "these dumb fake bitches these days, i swear" because you're one of them? LOOOL, i see you're trying to start a trend on talking shit about yourself, but okay, more power to you.

seriously, i'm just sick of these girls acting like they're the shit. these guys actually supporting it and encouraging this fuckery to happen. every girl thinks they're real and that they're the shit, and then they argue. fight. "waste cats" shut the fuuuuuck up.

whatever. as long as you leave me alone.

/rant

i'm sorry that....

2009-09-11T23:42:00.004-04:00

i'm not willing to dress like a whore to impress you. i'm not willing to throw myself on you. i'm not willing to get down on my knees for you. i'm not willing to expose everything to you. i'm not willing to talk about personal problems with you just yet. i'm not willing to get into your pants. i'm not willing to just talk about sexual stuff. i'm not willing to act like a slut to catch your eye. i'm not willing to act outrageous for your attention. i'm not willing to change for you to love me like the rest of them.

i'm sorry that....

i'm willing to put in time and effort. i'm willing to get to know you. i'm willing to understand you. i'm willing to know the little things that make you who you are. i'm willing to be interested in those basketball games and the car you so wanted. i'm willing to sit down and hold a conversation with you. i'm willing to laugh and share little secrets with you. i'm willing to talk to you about things i'm comfortable with. i'm willing to look you in the eye and tell you that i'm real. i'm willing to tell you that i like you for who you are, and not who you put up to be.

is it so bad to have somebody like that in your life?
because if so, i'm so sorry...

so, um, errrr...

2009-09-10T20:39:00.000-04:00

am i a hypocrite? yeah? well, kiss my ass :)

RULE NUMBER TWENTY SIX

2009-09-07T00:14:00.006-04:00

#26: HARD WORK WILL PAY OFF.

RULE NUMBER TWENTY FIVE

2009-09-07T00:14:00.003-04:00

#25: YOU CAN'T BECAUSE YOU SAY YOU CAN'T.

RULE NUMBER TWENTY FOUR

2009-09-07T00:14:00.001-04:00

#24: STOP MAKING EXCUSES.

RULE NUMBER TWENTY THREE

2009-08-30T20:20:00.001-04:00

#23: WHO SAYS YOU AREN'T INVINCIBLE?

RULE NUMBER TWENTY TWO

2009-08-28T17:15:00.001-04:00

#22: FUCK EVERYBODY AND BE INDEPENDENT.

yeah screw it.

2009-08-26T07:59:00.002-04:00

i hate blogskins. period.

SIMPLE IS THE WAY TO GO, LADIES AND GENTS.

enjoy.

on justin bieber

2009-08-26T07:45:00.004-04:00

idk why but i'm following justin bieber on twitter. it's amusing, okay, so don't judge, haha. but anyway, on with the topic... he's canadian! WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT REPRESENT. i'm gonna stop.

let's move on. all of your 'hardcore' justin bieber fans or whatever with the mrs. bieber going on, did you even know justin BEFORE he got signed by usher? did you even know he got signed by usher? haha. dude, i swear justin was better on youtube than he is now. i loved his covers.

i think that half of his crazy teenage fans didn't even know he was kidrauhl. and to be honest, i liked him better that way.

AND HOW DARE HE TURN DOWN JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE. DUDE, i understand usher is amazing and all, but usher and timberlake wanted to sign him. I WOULD EFFING SIGN WITH JT, just saying.

that's all i have to say about him.

why did i even post about him?

ignore this.

2009-08-24T23:21:00.001-04:00

this is me pushing down lindsay lohan's pictures. i'm sorry. real post on my real life *gasp* soon. don't stalk me you 52 or whatever followers. blah blah blah.

layout change

2009-08-24T23:19:00.000-04:00

i'm trying. i hate blogskins. but mine was getting rather boring. now, i feel like another one of those bloggers we have in canada that i can find at every high school and they just blog about their lives everyday.

i don't know. this layout isn't very smart for the things i blog about but maybe i'll take a swing at something new.

right? right?

it wouldn't hurt to experiment.

RULE NUMBER TWENTY ONE

2009-08-20T01:34:00.002-04:00

#21: YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE. DON'T "FIND" OR "CREATE" YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU'RE PROBABLY GOING TO DO THAT SUBCONSCIOUSLY. JUST LIVE.

RULE NUMBER SEVENTEEN

2009-08-14T19:13:00.003-04:00

(why didn't i notice that i had no number seventeen before?!)

#17: STOP THINKING ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE WANT AND START THINKING ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT AND WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY. THROUGH THIS, YOU'LL FIND THE REAL FRIENDS.

i'm not your saviour, save your energy

2009-08-04T02:50:00.002-04:00

Originally uploaded by Valeria :)

stop hurting, the tears will eventually dry
maybe next time, it'll be your truth and not lie
so stop crying, there's no room for it at all
should've thought about it before i let you fall
photo copyright to valeria.
poem by yours truly.

RULE NUMBER TWENTY

2009-08-03T23:14:00.001-04:00

#20: YOU CANNOT PROTECT YOURSELF FROM SADNESS WITHOUT PROTECTING YOURSELF FROM HAPPINESS.

RULE NUMBER NINETEEN

2009-08-03T23:06:00.002-04:00

#19: LOVE DOESN'T HURT. JEALOUS, REJECTION, ENVY, LONELINESS.. THOSE HURT. SO QUIT BLAMING LOVE AND START BLAMING THE ASSHOLE THAT BROKE YOUR HEART AND LET YOU GO.

Lindsay Lohan Spread on ELLE UK September 09 Issue

2009-08-03T18:55:00.002-04:00

(via fashionindie)

first look: vogue australia september 09

2009-08-03T18:43:00.004-04:00

featuring Abbey Lee Kershaw and Catherine McNeil
by Greg Kadel
(via fashionindie)

CONTAINS SOME NUDITY

marielle's must-haves

2009-07-27T23:13:00.002-04:00

7/27; Marielle's must-haves. by anonyMISS featuring Roberto Cavalli accessories

Inspired by a real article. Can't find the link to it, though :/

------

Every girl has at least more than two bags, and even guys know that they can never get enough. So, what to put in it? I'm personally obsessed with big bags and I love stuffing it with things that I find useful!

Rings — Who knows, maybe I'll need a ring to complete my outfit, you know? Haha.

Dolce & Gabbana Light Blue — I love this perfume!

Compact Powder — To keep my face from looking shiny.

Mascara — Diorshow is awesome.

Vogue Magazine — The perfect magazine for someone interested in fashion.

Necklaces — Same as the rings.

Purell — Gotta have hand sanitizer ready at all times!

Camera — Preferably an SLR, to snap the special moments in life that can't be repeated!

Money — Keep that chedda with you, you know?

Lipgloss — Nars has amazing ones, as well as Faces and Victoria's Secret.

Nylon Magazine — Another perfect magazine! Who knows when you are sitting with nothing to do, right?

Kleenex — Just in case.

Lotion — Always, always, always.

Watch — I don't normally keep this in my bag but rather on my wrist, but you know, I like to be punctual, haha.

Marc Jacobs Daisy — This perfume also smells really, really good!

Vera Wang Rock Princess — So Daisy is for a daytime date, like lunch. Light Blue is for a nice outing with a friend or just a walk in the park. Rock Princess? Nighttime and partying, yup!

iTouch — Always keep your tunes handy!

Eyeliner — Liquid and pencil in one little tube. Keep them near to fix up the make-up.

Cellphone — You need to be reached whenever and wherever!

Well, there's a look inside my bag and the must-haves.

headbanging and rockin out

2009-07-18T20:10:00.005-04:00

another one of my music posts! are you guys into the same tunes? comment with your favourite song of right now!

SNISH - ILLUSTRATIONS WHORE
turn it up / i'm out of control / now listen up / listen up

ALBERT HAMMOND JR. - HARD TO LIVE IN THE CITY
i've been following you for blocks / and i wish that you would stop / and tell me your name

AS TALL AS LIONS - DANCING IN THE REARVIEW
started / i still remember driving / our lights disturbed the highway

CONOR OBERST AND THE MYSTIC VALLEY BAND - NIKORETTE
i'm just trying to stay human being / sitting in the sun / eating ice cream

CRYSTAL ANTLERS - ANDREW
andrew sighs / don't let me die / don't try to fight

CRYSTAL CASTLES - CRIMWAVE (VS HEALTH)
eyes lit / on sharp breaths / from darks lips

DANNY FERNANDES - NEVER AGAIN
baby stop and think about it / tell me / where did we go wrong / how did it end like this

BIG CITY KIDS - ONE NIGHT STAND
hey little one night stand / don't you wanna get / one step closer to me

HEARTSREVOLUTION - ULTRAVIOLENCE
our love is a weapon / of mass destruction / destruction / cut deep into my skin

THE HORRORS - SEA WITHIN A SEA
see the scraping sky / far beyond the shallows / far beyond the reaches / of the shadows

JUNKIE XL FT. LAUREN ROCKET - CITIES IN DUST
water was running / children were running / you were running out of time

LA ROUX - IN FOR THE KILL
we can fight our desires / but when we start making fires / we get ever so hot

LEIGHTON MEESTER - BODY CONTROL
faster, louder / keep it going all night / i can take it to the limit / move it how i like

LISSY TRULLIE - SELF-TAUGHT LEARNER
you were my first kiss / you were my first miss / what we made was our own

LYKKE LI - TONIGHT
watch my back / so i'll make sure / you're right behind me as before

BABYSHAMBLES - DELIVERY
by or by the way / of an explanation / cast adrift off the shores of shotter's nation

THE KILLS - TAPE SONG
time ain't gonna cure you honey / time don't give a shit

GOLDEN SILVERS - ARROWS OF EROS
there was a girl who lived in london town / the scenes and sounds / they would only bring her down

LITTLE BOOTS - LOVE KILLS
love don't give no compensation / love don't pay no bills

METRIC - GIMME SYMPATHY
after all of this is gone / who would you rather be / the beatles or the rolling stones

SILVERSUN PICKUPS - PANIC SWITCH
if i go anywhere you want me to go / how will i know you'll still follow

SHINY TOY GUNS - FROZEN OCEANS
ten thousand miles apart / a frozen ocean joins our heart

MAPEI - PUBLIC ENEMY
i be on it / all night / yeah i be in that daze / still tippin'

MARIE DIGBY - GIRLFRIEND
i can't belong to anybody else right now / though it is not much of an excuse

MATT AND KIM - DAYLIGHT
i hope that someday / i'll see without these frames / and in the daylight

NADIA OH FT. SPACE COWBOY - GOT YOUR NUMBER
do you remember / when we first met / the way you looked / i can't forget

SHINY TOY GUNS - SEASON OF LOVE
every question / every answer too / ever constant / ever changing view

NO DOUBT - STAND AND DELIVER
stand and deliver / your money or your life / try and use a mirror / no bullet and no knife

OPPENHEIMER - BREAKFAST IN NYC
summer's in your heart / and i know that you're staying

THE PAINS OF BEING PURE AT HEART - THE TENURE ITCH
every night / he comes and goes again / if isn't right / it isn't him

THE PERISHERS - SWAY
i've had my head among the clouds / well now that i am coming down / won't you be my solid ground

PHANTOM PLANET - DO THE PANIC
guess i got in trouble too / nothing left for me to do / i guess i forgot to play it cool

PHOENIX - 1901
by now you know it's easy / like we did it all summer long

THE PIERCES - THREE WISHES
you won three wishes / want to fly to heavens / want to swim like fishes

PITBULL - HOTEL ROOM SERVICE
one's a company / two's a crowd / and three's a party

PLASTISCINES - BARCELONA
you can use anyone / but it won't be long / till somebody finds there's something wrong

SHINY TOY GUNS - RICOCHET!
welcome back to where we're gonna have you / shellshock / fall back

FABOLOUS FT. JEREMIH - MY TIME
go hard today / the past is the past you know / don't worry about the past / cause that's yesterday

SPINNERETTE - GHETTO LOVE
hey now there now / it's a game to be played

TEENAGERS - FEELING BETTER
playing their songs / and dancing along / feeling better

comment if you want any download links - i've got em... but i'm not responsible for what you do with them! (this whole RCAA crap.. yeah?)

also make sure to listen to MANNEQUINS (ash stymest's band) @ myspace.com/mannequinsband
check out josh beech's new band @ myspace.com/hildamay
and check out myspace.com/iblamecoco - she's amazing!

someone else has already said it best

2009-07-15T23:58:00.006-04:00

check my livejournal archive for more: http://marinerd.livejournal.com/27486.html

"I never even thought about whether or not they understand what I'm doing . . . the emotional reaction is all that matters as long as there's some feeling of communication, it isn't necessary that it be understood."
- John Coltrane

"Fear, loneliness. They’re the big ones, Rose. Some of the most terrible acts ever committed have been inspired by them. We’re not dealing with something that wants to conquer or destroy. There’s a lot of things you need to get across this universe. Warp drive, wormhole refractors. You know the thing you need most of all? You need a hand to hold."
- The Doctor ; "Doctor Who"

"Sometimes there are things in our life that aren't meant to stay. Sometimes change may not be what we want. Sometimes change is what we really need. And sometimes saying goodbye is the hardest thing you think you'll ever have to do, but sometimes it's saying "hello again" that breaks you down and makes you the most vulnerable person you'll ever know. Sometimes change is too much to bear, but most of the time change is the only thing saving your life."
- Anonymous

"When I see you, the world. It stops and all that exists for me, is you and my eyes staring at you. There’s nothing else. No noise, no other people, no thoughts or worries, no yesterday, no tomorrow. The world just stops and it’s a beautiful place and there’s only you. Just you. And my eyes staring at you. When you’re gone, the world starts again and I don’t like it as much. I can live in it, but I don’t like it. I just walk around in it, and wait to see you again and wait for it to stop again. I love it when it stops. It’s the best thing I’ve ever known or ever felt, the best thing, and that, is why I stare at you."
- Unknown

"I don’t believe in love, I believe in fucking. It’s honest, it’s efficient. You get in and out with a maximum of pleasure and a minimum of bullshit. Love is something straight people tell themselves they’re in so they can get laid. And then they end up hurting each other because it was all based on lies to begin with."
- Brian Kinney ; Queer As Folk

"I'm not asking you to forgive me. I'll never understand or forgive myself. And if a bullet gets me, so help me, I'll laugh at myself for being an idiot. There's one thing I do know... and that is that I love you, Scarlett. In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you. Because we're alike. Bad lots, both of us. Selfish and shrewd. But able to look things in the eyes as we call them by their right names."
- Rhett Butler ; Gone With The Wind

"Maybe we don't go to hell for the things we do, maybe we go to hell for the things we don't do."
- Chuck Palahniuk ; Lullaby

"I like too many things and get all confused and hung up running from one falling star to another till I drop. This is the night, what it does to you. I had nothing to offer anybody except my own confusion."
- Jack Kerouac ; On The Road

"Dear Annette, I don't know what I could possibly say that would rectify the harm I've caused you. The truth of the matter is that being with you was the only time I have ever been happy. My whole life has been a joke. I prided myself on taking joy in others' misery. Well, it finally backfired. I succeed in hurting the first person I ever loved. Enclosed is my most prized possession. My journal. For a long time I considered it my trophy. A sordid collection of my conquests. If you really want to know the truth than please read it. No more lies. Please give me another chance. I'm a wreck without you."
- Sebastian ; Cruel Intentions

"I love you. And not, not in a friendly way, although I think we're great friends. And not in a misplaced affection, puppy-dog way, although I'm sure that's what you'll call it. I love you. Very, very simple, very truly. You are the-the epitome of everything I have ever looked for in another human being. And I know that you think of me as just a friend, and crossing that line is-is-is the furthest thing from an option you would ever consider. But I had to say it. I just, I can't take this anymore. I can't stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I can't-I can't look into your eyes without feeling that-that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels. I can't talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are. And I know this will probably queer our friendship - no pun intended - but I had to say it, 'cause I've never felt this way before, and I-I don't care. I like who I am because of it. And if bringing this to light means we can't hang out anymore, then that hurts me. But God, I just, I couldn't allow another day to go by without just getting it out there, regardless of the outcome, which by the look on your face is to be the inevitable shoot-down. And, you know, I'll accept that. But I know, I know that some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there's a moment of hesitation, then that means you feel something too. And all I ask, please, is that you just - you just not dismiss that, and try to dwell in it for just ten seconds. Alyssa, there isn't another soul on this fucking planet who has ever made me half the person I am when I'm with you, and I would risk this friendship for the chance to take it to the next plateau. Because it is there between you and me. You can't deny that. Even if, you know, even if we never talk again after tonight, please know that I am forever changed because of who you are and what you've meant to me, which - while I do appreciate it - I'd never need a painting of birds bought at a diner to remind me of."
- Holden ; Chasing Amy

"When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No... don't blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn't sound very exciting, does it? But it is!"
- Iannis ; Captain Corelli's Mandolin

"I saw the future once, I was drunk in a phone booth. My eyes were wet and red but I could not tell what was said and through the screams of the traffic; voices carried saying 'I am sorry.' On a day so grey it's black inside, watching churches on TV. In a coma you don't dream - you just hope that someone sits with you."
- Douglas Coupland ; Girlfriend In A Coma

"So I guess this is where I tell you what I learned - my conclusion, right? Well, my conclusion is: Hate is baggage. Life's too short to be pissed off all the time. It's just not worth it. Derek says it's always good to end a paper with a quote. He says someone else has already said it best. So if you can't top it, steal from them and go out strong. So I picked a guy I thought you'd like. 'We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory will swell when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature.'"
- Danny Vinyard ; American History X

"You listen to me. I've been alive a bit longer than you, and dead a lot longer than that. I've seen things you couldn't imagine, and done things I prefer you didn't. Don't exactly have a reputation for being a thinker. I've only my blood, which doesn't exactly rush in the direction of my brain, so I make a lot of mistakes, a lot of wrong, bloody calls. A hundred plus years, and there's only one thing I've ever been sure of -- you. Hey, look at me. I'm not asking you for anything. When I say I love you, it's not because I want you, or because I can't have you, and it has nothing to do with me. I love what you are. What you do. How you try. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and the worst of you, and I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You are a hell of a woman. You're the one, Buffy."
- Spike ; Buffy The Vampire Slayer

"She looked up at him with dead eyes and smiled.
'How did you find me?' he asked.
She was silent, for a while, in the moonlight. Then she said, 'You are the nearest thing I have to life. You are the only thing I have left, the only thing that isn’t bleak and flat and gray. I could be blindfolded and dropped into the deepest ocean and I would know where to find you. I could be buried a hundred miles underground and I would know where you are.'"
- Neil Gaiman ; American Gods

"I can't go with you Tad, because you don't love me, you maybe want to love me. But I think what you love right now is the idea of me. You can't love someone for what they stand for or seem to be. You have to love them for their details, for the little things that are true of them and only them."
- Rosalee ; Win A Date With Tad Hamilton

"When you were little, couldn't have been more than five, you just started asking questions. How come we didn't have a mom. Why did we always have to move around. Where's Dad. I remember I begged you, 'Quit asking, Sammy. You don't want to know.' I just wanted you to be a kid. Just for a little while longer. Always tried to protect you. Keep you safe. Dad didn't even have to tell me. It's just always my responsibility, you know? It's like I had one job. I had one job, and I screwed it up. I blew it, and for that, I'm sorry. I guess that’s what I do. I let down the people I love. Y’know, I let Dad down, and now I guess I’m just supposed to let you down, too. How can I? How am I supposed to live with that? What am I supposed to do? Sammy? What am I supposed to do?"
- Dean Winchester ; Supernatural

"Failure's hard, but success is far more dangerous. If you're successful at the wrong thing, the mix of praise and money and opportunity can lock you in forever."
- Po Bronson, Author of "What Should I Do With My Life"

"Everyone says love hurts, but that is not true. Loneliness hurts. Rejection hurts. Losing someone hurts. Envy hurts. Everyone gets these things confused with love, but in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all pain and makes someone feel wonderful again. Love is the only thing in this world that does not hurt."
- Unknown

"Some say love is blind while others say there is love at first sight. For those who say love is blind, I say open your eyes and take in the endless possibilities of beauty and compassion. For those who believe in love at first sight, take time to close your eyes, look into your heart, and find out whose face it is that you see."
- John Shows

"When adults say, 'Teenagers think they are invincible' with that sly, stupid smile on their faces, they don't know how right they are. We need never be hopeless, becuase we can never be irreparably broken. We think that we are invincible becuase we are. We cannot be born, and we cannot die. Like all energy, we can only change shapes and sizes and manifestations. They forget that when they get old. They get scared of losing and failing. But that part of us greater than the sum of our parts cannot begin and cannot end, and so it cannot fail."
- John Green ; Looking For Alaska

"There is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these loveable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. The person who defines your understanding of love is not inherently different than anyone else, and they’re often just the person you happen to meet the first time you really, really, want to love someone. But that person still wins. They win, and you lose. Because for the rest of your life, they will control how you feel about everyone else."
- Chuck Klosterman

"I've been making a list of the things they don't teach you at school. They don't teach you how to love somebody. They don't teach you how to be famous. They don't teach you how to be rich or how to be poor. They don't teach you how to walk away from someone you don't love any longer. They don't teach you how to know what's going on in someone else's mind. They don't teach you what to say to someone who's dying. They don't teach you anything worth knowing."
- Neil Gaiman

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”
- Neil Gaiman

"...But you're not looking for a nice girl. You're not looking for someone genuinely interested in your intermural basketball game, or your anatomy midterm grade, or that argument you keep having with your father; you're looking for a quick fix, a night when you can pretend to have a connection with another human being which is just as disposable as the condom you were using during it."
- Anonymous

Life is a disease: sexually transmitted, and invariably fatal.
- Neil Gaiman

"I wanted so badly to lie down next to her on the couch, to wrap my arms around her and sleep. Not fuck, like in those movies. Not even have sex. Just sleep together, in the most innocent sense of the phrase. But I lacked the courage and she had a boyfriend and I was gawky and she was gorgeous and I was hopelessly boring and she was endlessly fascinating. So I walked back to my room and collapsed on the bottom bunk. Thinking about if people were rain. I was drizzle and she was hurricane."

- John Greene (Looking For Alaska)

i was just running through the pages and those stood out.

hey little one night stand

2009-07-15T23:58:00.001-04:00

http://bobbypinstotimessquare.blogspot.com/2009/07/hellooo-readers-today-we-have-interview.html#comments

thanks, simplyvera!

how to pronounce fashion designer names

2009-07-08T21:15:00.002-04:00

yeah, i mean, i felt illiterate when i got corrected with a few so here if it helps you. if anything, it'll help you not feel dumb when you do get corrected, har-har.

Hermès = err-mez

Lanvin = lohn-vohn

Balmain = bal-mahn

Balenciaga = bal-en-see-ya-ga

Yves Saint Laurent = eeves-sane-loh-rahnt

Moschino = moe-skee-noh

Proenza Schouler = pro-in-za-skool-er

Marchesa = mar-kay-sa

Bottega Veneta = bo-te-ga-ve-ne-ta (emphasis on the BO and VEN)

Bulgari = bal-gah-ree

Hervé Léger = her-vay lay-jay

Givenchy = je-von-shee

Thierry Mugler = tee-air-ee-moog-lay

summer playlist!

2009-07-03T15:00:00.003-04:00

i hope you guys aren't expecting any songs like "Summer Girl" by Stereos or something... cause if you were, you aren't gonna find it here! haha - have fun :)
* alot of these songs are old, but timeless... cause i love old songs when they finally get played out and when you listen to them again, they're just the best :)

young cardinals - alexisonfire
emerald street - alexisonfire
you, me and the bourgeoisie - the submarines
before the worst - the scripts
tape song - the kills
obsessed - mariah carey
still fly freestyle - drake
walking on the moon - kanye west f/ the dream
radio ladio - metronomy
junior year - late nite wars
that girl has love - rooney
champagne supernova - oasis
paris 2004 - peter bjorn & john
dark center of the universe - modest mouse
sway - the perishers
arrows of eros - golden silvers
love kills - little boots
dakota - a rocket to the moon

i'll have a new post later tonight with more songs, but for now, have fun.

bottega veneta menswear

2009-07-01T23:26:00.002-04:00

if only my man dressed like this...

via fashionindie

stolen girlfriends club

2009-07-01T19:31:00.001-04:00

via fashionindie

i love leather

2009-06-28T20:22:00.000-04:00

get a grip and hold onto your seats. i absolutely love leather and jackets, so leather jackets? makes my life that much more amazing.

lookbook it

2009-06-25T19:09:00.003-04:00

Find me on Lookbook, guys! I'm there @ http://lookbook.nu/morningmelody

Rest In Paradise, King of Pop.

2009-06-25T19:04:00.002-04:00

Michael Jackson reportedly died at the age of 50 due to cardiac arrest.

The true King of Pop has passed away, and I hope that he rests in peace. I'm in serious need of tlc because MJ has been an inspiration and a true performer from the very start. He'll never be forgotten, regardless of the accusations and the negative media that has been put out over the years. He is a role model to all and he is the TRUE KING OF POP! You'll be missed, MJ!

Thriller night. (Devastating story, and it's devastating that Vince Carter got traded to Orlando Magic. That's just whack...)

RULE NUMBER EIGHTEEN

2009-06-21T16:20:00.001-04:00

#18: YOU ARE WORTH MORE THAN WHATEVER THEY HAVE TO OFFER.

designer spotlight: alexander wang

2009-06-14T21:17:00.003-04:00

Meet Alexander Wang (as if you already didn't know), a Chinese-American designer who is a California native. At only 18 years old, he moved to New York City to attend Parsons Design School and work many intern jobs. He launched his full womens collection in 2007, selling internationally to over 200 boutiques and retail stores. A full accessories collection followed in 2008. Now, Alexander Wang is 25 and resides in New York City's LES, or Lower East Side. He has been recognized world-wide and has received a few, well deserved top honors and awards. He is definitely a L.E.S. Artiste.

Taken from WWD:

“[Fall] was the season where people really recognized us,” says Wang. “We’re under a microscope now. We have to watch our moves and make sure everything we do is right.”

“I’m not taking away from what I’m selling, and confusing the customer. I realized there were no T-shirts that spoke to my aesthetic,” he says. “You have those L.A. brands and then you have the $200, $300 shirts from The Row and Rick Owens.”

“Necklines are stretched and armholes are strategically lowered so that it looks worn in,” he explains. “It’s like sleeping in a T-shirt and then wearing it the next day. It’s not this crisp little T out of the dryer. It’s draped and kind of wilted.”

“Everyone’s been doing an open-toe,” says Wang. “I added the thong to give a fresh perspective and make it more provocative. The thong between your toes, it draws your attention to that area.”

“It’s just an evolution now,” he remarks. “People are either going to love [the changes] or hate [them], but they’ll recognize you for it. You have to show that the brand can evolve and that there’s a future for it.”

He's already helped friend and long time model Erin Wasson set up her own fashion line! She said that he was the one to get her started and now, Erin Wasson for RVCA will be in stores and it's looking fab!

You can see celebrities wearing and sporting Alexander Wang clothing!

This amazing and creative designer isn't going anywhere, at least not yet. He'll hopefully moving onto better things. Look out for him and check out his stuff at retail stores and boutiques around the world. They're fresh and ready-to-wear! Although you see the models sporting them down the runway, they're still wearable on the streets too. Amazing, isn't he? He is.

Don't forget about the face of this wonderful designer, Alexander Wang because he'll be sticking around. Click his name to be redirected to his site!!

By the way, those shorts are God's gift to us, oh my goodness. Thank you Alex.

tunes i jam to

2009-06-10T22:59:00.004-04:00

here's another post and another playlist. for june 10th, at least, haha. i was busy updating my new itouch so i was headbanging to nearly everything and dancing in my chair. haha. enjoy, guys.

body language - jesse mccartney ft. tpain **
parlez-vous francais/konnichiwa, come and move it my way/hey, little chica from guadelupe

heartless (cover) - kris allen ***
in the night, i hear em talk/the coldest story ever told/somewhere far along this road/he lost his soul

landlocked blues - bright eyes ***
but greed is a bottomless pit/and our freedom's a joke/we're just taking a piss

revelry - kings of leon
what a night for a dance/you know i'm a dancing machine/with the fire in my bones

ooh la la (benny benassi remix) - goldfrapp **
dial up my number now/weaving it through the wire/switch me on/turn me up

beat goes on - madonna ft. pharell & kanye west
don't sit there like some silly girl/if you wait too long/it'll be too late

corona and lime - shwayze ft. cisco *
baby will you be my/corona and lime/and i will be your main squeeze

price of company - white tie affair *
see that girl right there/they say she's sexy as hell

day n nite (remix) - kid cudi ft. collie buddz **
i smoke the best weed/i carefully pick out the stems and seeds/the doctor's orders keep my eyes a bleed

therapy - tpain ft. kanye west *
like 1, 2, 3, 4/get the hell up out my door/5, 6, 7, 8/don't need your sex/i'll masturbate

lovers in japan - coldplay ***
lovers, keep on the road your on/runners, until the race is run

unstoppable - kat deluna ft. lil wayne
you can talk all you want/but my skin is really thick/i'm the leader of the crowd/and my game is really slick

the rake's song - the decemberists *
i had entered into a marriage/in the summer of my 21st year/and the bells rang for our wedding/only now do i remember it clear

no you girls - franz ferdinand *
no you girls never know/no, no you girls never know/how you make a boy feel

beautiful - eminem **
what size you wear/i wear tens/let's see if you can fit your feet

* = old
** = recommended
*** = old and recommended

love to get to know you

2009-06-10T19:47:00.004-04:00

taken from coco tutu @ lovecocotutu.blogspot.com

67 Questions

1) Are your parents married or divorced?
married

2) Are you a vegetarian?
heaven knows i've tried and would be one, but no

3) Do you believe in Heaven?
yes

4) Have you ever come close to dying?
multiple times

5) What jewelry do you wear 24/7?
none

6) Favorite time of day?
morning, early morning as in like 1am, and late night (11pm)

7) Do you eat the stems of broccoli?
sometimes

8) Do you wear makeup?
occasionally

9) Ever have plastic surgery?
no, thank you

10) Do you color your hair?
never

11) What do you wear to bed?
loose tee, shorts or sweats depending on season

12) Have you ever done anything illegal?
yeah

13) Can you roll your tongue?
yeah

14) Do you tweeze your eyebrows?
just to fix 'em up

15) What kind of sneakers?
nike, converse and adidas

16) Do you believe in Abortions?
i believe in pro-choice

17) What is your hair color?
black but in the sunlight, it's brown or has light brown highlights

18) Future child's name?
i want all boys, but i've still to decide on a solid name

19) Do you snore?
not that i know of

20) If you could go anywhere in the world where would it be?
europe

21) Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
they're around but i don't hug 'em

22) If you won the lottery, what would you do first?
save some, spend some, donate some

23) Hamburger or hot dog?
depends

24) If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?
sushi or salad

25) City, beach or country?
city

26) What was the last thing you touched?
keyboard

27) Where did you eat last?
the old spaghetti factory

28) When's the last time you cried?
yawning earlier today

29) Do you read blogs?
well, yeah

30) Would you ever go out dressed like the opposite sex?
i have

31) Ever been involved with the police?
yeah

32) What's your favorite shampoo, conditioner and soap?
i don't have favourites

33) Do you talk in your sleep?
not that i know of, or at least not anymore

34) Ocean or pool?
i don't care

35) What's your favorite song at the moment?
body language by jesse mccartney featuring t-pain

36) What's your favorite color(s)?
i like alot and it changes alot

37) Window seat or aisle?
on a plane? window

38) Ever met anyone famous?
sort of

39) Do you feel that you've had a truly successful life?
i'd like to think that i'm not done living

40) Do you twirl your spaghetti or cut it?
twirl

41) Ricki Lake or Oprah?
neither

42)Basketball or Football?
basketball

43) How long do your showers last?
usually 15 minutes

44) Automatic or Manual?
manual

45) Cake or ice cream?
cake

46) Are you self-conscious?
yeah, somewhat

47) Have you ever drank so much you threw up?
i know my limit, so no

48) Have you ever given money to a tramp?
no

49) Have you been in love?
i'd like to say so

50) Where do you wish you were?
in new york for the summer

51) Are you wearing socks?
nope

52) Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?
nope

53) Can you tango?
nope

54) Last gift you received?
itouch with my name engraved

55) Last sport you played?
basketball

56) Things you spend a lot of money on?
clothes

57) Where do you live?
canada

58) Where were you born?
philippines

59) Last wedding attended?
my cousin's, for which i had to read

60) Favorite Drink?
coffee, iced tea, iced coffee, tea, smoothies

61) What'd you do last weekend?
i hung out at home

62) Most hated food(s)?
the list can go on for months

63) What's your least fav chore?
i don't really get assigned chores

64) Can you sing?
i'd like to think so, haha

65) Last person you instant messaged?
vicky

66) Last place you went on holiday?
philippines

67) Current Crush?
nobody really

RULE NUMBER SIXTEEN

2009-06-05T22:22:00.001-04:00

#16: BORN TO LOSE, DESTINED TO WIN.

RULE NUMBER FIFTEEN

2009-06-04T22:24:00.002-04:00

#15: AT THE END OF THE DAY, THE ONLY OPINION THAT MATTERS IS THE ONE THAT IS GOD'S.

RULE NUMBER FOURTEEN

2009-06-04T22:22:00.002-04:00

#14: DON'T QUESTION WHY SOMETHING BAD HAPPENS TO YOU, UNLESS YOU DO THE SAME WHEN SOMETHING GOOD HAPPENS TO YOU.

interview with polyvore's It'sLily,Love♥Adam♥Lambert♥

2009-05-31T22:37:00.003-04:00

Meet Lily, also known as It'sLily,Love♥ to all of Polyvore. She's willingly agreed to answer my questions for her, and I'm sure alot of people are dying to find out her inspiring answers. Check out her sets, they are truly stunning! And also, read the whole interview, because she gave me such amazing answers!

View 'i smile, you smile, the end ;' on Polyvore

What made you interested in fashion in the first place?
When I was 8 years old, my mom started working at Bloomingdale's, and sometimes I'd get to go see her. I started to become really fascinated with all the different clothes on the mannequins, the bright colors all over the store, and the way people would mix and match different patterns. Also, my mom is a huge inspiration to me when it comes to everything...she's really the one I should credit for getting me into fashion.

Who is/are your style icon(s)?
My style icons would have to be Rachel Bilson and Lauren Conrad. Rachel, because she has this fun, effortless style, and she's so fearless. I love that about her. The versatility she has in her style is something no one else has. She can be going to the market, and she'll get all dressed up for it. Not many people do that. She makes going out and grabbing the mail a huge occassion. I just think that's so fun. As for Lauren, I've always been such a big fan. I think she's a great style icon because she can take everyday pieces like the little black dress or a pair of skinny jeans and make them so chic. Even if she's wearing a simple black blazer, she'll look stunning because of her fresh, unique approach to dressing.

What inspires you when making your sets on Polyvore?
When I'm making sets on Polyvore, I usually try to find one item that really catches my eye, and then I base my whole set off of that. Usually, it'll be a dress or a top, but sometimes if I see some really nice shoes, I can use them too as my first item. It all depends on what attracts the eye, I think.

Who is/are your favourite designer(s) and why?
My favorite designers are Chanel and 3.1 Phillip Lim. Chanel is just a timeless, elegant brand that will never get old. Every single piece is so different and lovely in its own way. 3.1 Phillip Lim has always been one of my favorites. It's perfect in every single way. You can work any one piece into your every day wardrobe, and I think that that's very important.

If you could attend one show during New York Fashion Week, which show would you attend and why?
I would attend Christian Siriano's show. I loved him on Project Runway, and I love him now. His style is so different, fun, and quirky. I love every one of his creations, and I would kill to wear something that he made.

If you had all the money in the world, what would you spend it on?
I would probably give most of that money away to kids living in third-world countries, especially the little known ones like Bangladesh and such. If I were to have any left, I would buy a beach house in Malibu and invest in a pair of Louboutins.

Do you follow trends? If so, which are your favourites and least favourites?
I suppose I do follow trends, but it depends. I'm not a very practical dresser, and I try to have at least one item that is eye-catching, so one of my favorite trends would have to be colorful flats. I'm a huge fan of peep-toe heels, but I don't own a pair myself. If I could, I would definitely get a pair of Miu Miu peep-toes. Another one of my favorite trends is bows. I like including lots and lots of bows in my sets. My least favorite trends are oxford shoes and fringe-y boots. I've never really liked them. I'm not sure why, I just have never found ways to work them into my daily wardrobe.

Do the sets you create on Polyvore reflect your style in real life? If so, how?
The sets I create on Polyvore definitely reflect on my style in real life, in a big way. I love scarves more than anything, and I love pairing them with sweaters. I'm also having a huge obsession with shorts at the moment. I'm not a huge glove-wearer, but I have two colorful pairs and one lacy pair. All these things can be seen included in my sets.

What are your favourite stores?
My favorite stores are Free People, Forever 21, and Urban Outfitters.

What are some bands/books/songs/people etc. that inspire you?
I listen to All Time Low, Breaking Benjamin, Bullet for My Valentine, and Eyes Set To Kill a lot, as well as other bands when I need inspiration. As for people, Chrisstinaa!, Manda, Laura, watching.clouds, and Lindsey are very inspirational. There's a song called 'Darling' that means everything to me. :]

If you were the fashion police, what would be illegal?
Abercrombie and Hollister would be illegal if I were the fashion police. Those would be the first things I'd think to make illegal.

What is your favourite item that you own?
My favorite item that I own is my black sweater. It has gold buttons and white stripes. It's sort of perfect for any occasion.

Do you have any set making advice for anybody?
Even if everyone else is doing something else, stick with what you're comfortable with. I recently just made a mosaic-y type of set, and it wasn't 'me' at all. I'm all about trying new things and doing something different once in a while, but most of the time, I think it's really important to be doing what you want, not what others are doing.

Do you have an inspiration quote or any advice for anybody on fashion?
Fashion isn't all about what's being worn by celebrities or what designers are making. It's about releasing your inner creativity and making yourself look and feel good. When I think about fashion, I think about having fun and going crazy. I've never had a day when I've 'worried' about finding something to wear for an occasion. It's just so much fun for me. It's not something that should be taken seriously.

it doesn't take a genius to figure it out

2009-05-30T17:21:00.003-04:00

And yes, of course, our favourite girls are best dressed.

interview with polyvore's Coco Tutu ♥

2009-05-30T13:23:00.002-04:00

Meet E, also known as Coco Tutu ♥ on Polyvore. She's known for her amazing mosaic sets, usually soft colours or dark, edgy colours. She's willingly answered the questions that I asked her, and her answers are definitely unique! Remember to check out her sets, they are gorgeous!

View 'best stories' on Polyvore

What made you interested in fashion in the first place?
For fashion, I've loved it all my life. Probably what inspired me were mainly two things: My mom and my city. First of all my mom is really a style icon- she has amazing items and truly great sense of style. I've always loved playing with her Birkin bags and walking in her Manolos. She showed me a great side of fashion which inspired me to pursue it. Second is my city. I live in NYC which is filled with fashionable people and I am exposed to tons of fashion so I think that also inspired me.

Who is/are your style icon(s)?
Wow, that's a tough one.
I adore:
Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's. Wow, all her outfits were amazing and if you find a pair of tortoiseshell glasses like that I will LOVE you forever!
I love Kate Moss's ability to look fabulous in everything and try new things.
I think Mary Kate Olsen has some good inspiration in a boho glam look.
I love Blair Waldrof's preppy chic look
I think that Cory Kennedy pulls of a grunge boho glam high fashion look fabulously

What inspires you when making your sets on Polyvore?
When making sets on Polyvore I normally get inspired by a picture I see or an item I find. Sometimes I find a cute quote or even have a mood I am in. Also, RP characters and their diverse personality and things that happened that day.

Who is/are your favourite designer(s) and why?
I love Hermes for being so timeless and classic, YSL and Chanel for the same, Marc Jacobs is always just fabulous, Phillip Lim 3.1 for having amazing clothing, Acne for their fabulous dresses (as seen on lagarconne.com) and of course I LOVE Balenciaga.

If you could attend one show during New York Fashion Week, which show would you attend and why?
Gosh just one? Probably Chanel or Balenciaga. Chanel always pulls on a fabulous show and I am just in love with Balenciaga and their edgy fashions.

If you had all the money in the world, what would you spend it on?
-Hermes Birkin
-Chanel 2.55 Bag
-Sass & Bide denim shorts
-Alexander Wang tank top
-Balenciaga big city bag
-Hermes bangles
-Bulgari bracelets, necklaces, everything
-Cartier earrings
-Boyfriend jeans, Current & Elliot
-Chanel flats
-MANOLOS!
-Louboutins
-Jimmy Choos
-BAGS, SHOES and more! I would go crazy :).

Do you follow trends? If so, which are your favourites and least favourites?
I do follow trends in the fact I like to know what is "in" and "out" but i can't say I follow them. I just wear whatever I like :).
I think that one shoulder dresses are fabulous for spring and love distressed denim shorts. I don't love harem pants, and this isn't really a trend but I like Hunter boots but the fact now everyone in my school are wearing them is getting my annoyed.

Your mosaics are stunning. How long does it take you to create one and where do you find all the items?
Wow, thanks! Well, it depends. A set like that has taken me 2 minutes or 2 weeks. It depends on how much inspiration I have and how quickly and how good items I already have to compliment the set. Sometimes I don't have a story so a finished draft also sits in my sets for weeks.

Do the sets you create on Polyvore reflect your style in real life? If so, how?
Somewhat the styles do. I would wear everything that I make. I genuinely like all the outfits. However some are a bit more edgy or bright or showy than what I would wear, but I would love wearing them. I just wish I had all the items!

What are your favourite stores?
I love Olive & Bettes a boutique in NYC, the stores of my favorite designers and Bergdorf's, Barney's, Bloomingdale's and Sak's.

If you were the fashion police, what would be illegal?
Tube Tops, Uggs with Sweatpants, too much Abercrombie / Hollister with the logo Coach bag and Juicy Couture gold charm bracelet.

Do you have any set making advice for anybody?
For Polyvore making advice mine would be:
-don't copy
-be yourself
-try to find inspiration
-just go with it! see what comes out no matter how ridiculous it may seem! experiment with things you may not wear in real life!

Do you have any fashion advice for anybody?
For fashion advice, mine would be:
-wear what you want not what others wear
-be yourself and don't be afraid to take risks
-invest in classics and quality pieces which will last a lifetime

interview with polyvores your lullaby ;

2009-05-29T23:26:00.002-04:00

Meet Mechele, also known as your lullaby ; on Polyvore. She, fortunately, agreed to let me ask her a bunch of questions and her answers are truly inspiring! Look out for her on Polyvore - her sets are astonishing and brilliant!

View 'Les Filles Riches Crasseuses' on Polyvore

What made you interested in fashion in the first place?
Probably the fact that its one of the most obvious ways of expressing yourself. Its the first thing people see when you first meet them, so in my opinion its something very important and expressive, that everyone should try to customize to their own personalities.

Who is/are your style icon(s)?
I have a lot of icons, but the most important ones to me are Daisy Lowe, Mary-Kate and Ashley, and Becky Lou Filip.

What inspires you when making your sets on Polyvore?
Lots of things, mostly music though. The look and feel of my sets really depend of what type of music I was listening to while I was making them.

Who is/are your favourite designer(s) and why?
Coco Chanel and Marc Jacobs are my absolute favourites. I love Chanel because every piece is very classic, and I love Marc Jacobs because his pieces are fun to play around with, especially in sets.

If you could attend one show during New York Fashion Week, which show would you attend and why?
Probably Jill Stuart's, she's just amazing.

If you had all the money in the world, what would you spend it on?
Clothes, lots of clothes. And in two years when I turn 16 I would probably buy a fancy car of some sort.

Your roleplay sets have amazing stories. Where do you get your muse from?
I try and figure out what I want the mood for the story to be, not necessarily what will happen, but just the feel of it so I can pick out what type of music to listen to while I'm writing it. Then while I'm listening to songs that fit the story's mood, the story itself usually just comes together without that much planning of the actual details. So my muses for the stories are almost always singers or bands.

Do you follow trends? If so, which are your favourites and least favourites?
I'm sure if you really looked at me or my sets you would find trends that I've followed, but I never think to myself 'I have to wear this just because everyone else is.' I try and just wear and make sets with the things I genuinely like, not things I've made myself think I like or should like.

Do you think you are a fashionable person for your age?
In my opinion, yes, but everyone has a different idea of what they think is 'fashionable.' To some people I probably am, but I'm sure some other people think differently.

Do the sets you create on Polyvore reflect your style in real life? If so, how?
They do now, but they haven't always. I went through a few month period where basically the only sets I made were for other people, but now they definitely reflect my style in real life. If you knew me personally and looked at any of my sets that I've made within the last month or so, you would definitely see that they're reflective of my real life style.

What are your favourite stores?
It really depends on what I'm looking for, but my absolute favourites are Urban Outfitters and Top Shop.

If you were the fashion police, what would be illegal?
Probably clothes that don't fit properly and things that aren't very original or have been done too much.

Do you have any set making advice for anybody?
Not really, I don't want to say to people how I think they should make sets. The only thing I can say is that you should make them way you feel the most comfortable making them and the way you think they turn out the best for you. Everyone should make the types of sets that work for them and make them the way they like to.

Do you have any fashion advice for anybody?
I think the only fashion advice I would give would be 'Dress for yourself and always wear the things you like. Never try to please other people by changing your style, it won't do anyone any good.'

RULE NUMBER THIRTEEN

2009-05-29T20:40:00.003-04:00

#13: JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE HURTING, DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN BE MENDED.

mixed lyrics part 2

2009-05-29T20:28:00.003-04:00

Featuring songs from my Blogspot playlist.

You're the best I ever had
Let me hold you for the last time
This can be the future
I'll be your sunshine, you can be mine

Love you girl, do you feel the same?
I wake up every morning with tears in my eyes
Through the storms and the light
Into the pale moonlight

I used to hate you, but now I love you
There are bones to bury and bones to find
The talking leads to touching
You keep on crying, baby, I'll bleed you dry

I am the watch you always wear but you forget to wind
If you've got problems, why don't you go solve them?
I can see you, see you there, hanging weightless in the air
Haligh, haligh, an awful lie

Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding
Just because I'm losing, doesn't mean I'm lost
Only for a moment's sake, you called it and it came
I need some fine wine, and you, you need to be nicer

Last one was so much better and kind of made more sense. Go browse for it dans l'histoire!

designer spotlight: matthew williamson

2009-05-29T17:02:00.003-04:00

Meet Matthew Williamson, a creative designer that lives in Mayfair. Until very recently, he lent his style which is comprised of vibrant, fun colours and bold prints to Pucci, and he is now working with H&M. Matthew made his first move in global fashion in 2002, when he began showing in New York. Three years later, he was hired as creative director of Pucci.

Here are a few excerpts from an interview he had, featured in H&M Magazine Summer 2009 edition:

"It was so much fun doing menswear after ten years concentrating on womenswear, he says.
I thought, Brilliant, here's a chance to capture what I really love in my own wardrobe."

"While at college, I wanted to express a certain femininity and escapist quality in my work, he says. These values remain key to my work today."

"Color is essential to my design."

When famous actress, Keira Knightley, wore a purple Matthew Williamson dress to the London premiere of Pride and Prejudice, waiting lists started to grow all over town. Everybody wanted that purple dress!

Also, when famous actress, Sienna Miller, attended the Oscars dressed in a beautiful emerald green chiffon dress with antique golden beads by Matthew Williamson, the dress received a great deal of attention.

Taken from the same H&M Magazine issue, here is "typical Matthew Williamson":

Indian Influences
A trip to India while at Central St. Martins College of Art & Design was the first of many.

An explosion of color
He has yet to meet a color he doesn't like.

High-impact patterns
Like his predecessor, Emilio Pucci, he loves kaleidoscopic prints.

Floral!
Imaginative floral and animal motifs are recurrent features of his collections.

Exotic!
Every collection takes the people who wear the clothes to exotic horizons and fantastic sunsets.

Voluminous shapes
Generous, billowing fabric is a classic feature of a Matthew Williamson dress.

Luxurious materials like silk and cashmere
He focuses on explosive materials - quality is a centrepiece of his design.

Now, innovative and mindblowing designer Matthew Williamson is known around the world, and is friends with many famous celebrities such as Madonna, Gwyneth Paltrow, Mischa Barton, Sienna Miller, Sophie Dahl, Brooke Shields, Diane Kruger, Kate Beckinsale and many more!

If you want more from this designer, his collection will be featured in the latest H&M line. Also, visit his website at Matthew Williamson

many thanks

2009-05-28T16:36:00.000-04:00

Guys, guys, guys! Do you know how happy and honoured I am feeling right now?

Please, check this link out: http://blog.polyvore.com/2009/05/polyvore-love-letters-blog-roundup_26.html.

I am featured in Polyvore's Blog Roundup! It's amazing!

Thank you Polyvore :D

RULE NUMBER TWELVE

2009-05-27T23:29:00.003-04:00

#12: TIME DOES NOT WAIT FOR ANYBODY. YOU DON'T, EITHER.

my music playlist

2009-05-27T18:02:00.004-04:00

so hey, i thought, why the hell not? i'll share with you the tunes that have been ringing through my ears and that i've been singing out loud these past couple of days.

rose - n.l.t.
so fine - sean paul
no te veo - jowell y randy
decisions - neyo
broken strings - james morrison f/ nelly furtado
come on get higher - matt nathanson
asleep - the smiths
kidnapping your love - emilio f/ bobby valentino
standing in the way of control - the gossips
beautiful - eminem
can you do it - keri hilson
mamacita - collie buddz
weightless - black lab
smoke in your disguise - new roman times
nikorette - conor oberst and the mystic valley band
melt down the knives - sin fang bonus
for blue skies - strays don't sleep
closer - kings of leon
springfield - sufjan stevens
underdog - spoon
inherited scars - sage francis
good girls go bad - cobra starship f/ leighton meester
blender (i really fuckin' love you) - the pretty reckless

guys, that can last you at least like an hour or two, haha.

interview with polyvore's tanalicious

2009-05-27T16:51:00.002-04:00

Meet Tana, also known as tanalicious on Polyvore. I've asked the same bunch of questions, and like always, the answers given are unique, fresh, inspiring and exciting! Be sure to watch out for Tana! She has amazing sets and some even come with wonderful stories!

View 'fave sets of mine' on Polyvore

Who is your style icon?
audrey hepburn & nicole riche. audreay because of her efforlessly chic style. i just adore her. nicole because she rock the hippie/boho look i'm so into. from her wavy hair to ther chucnky accessories. she's it. i love her.

Do the sets you make on Polyvore reflect your style in real life?
not really. i can't afford high-end designer stuffs, so i'm more of high street fashion. in polyvore though, it's more about the styling. how to incorporate certain outfit with the mood/places, etc. i love being creative and always learn new things here.

If you had all the money in the world, what is the first thing you'd buy?
since i am into gadgets as much as fashion, i want to buy everything from barney's and apple store.lol a girl could dream!

What inspires you when making your sets on Polyvore?
everything inspired me, from songs, places, events, pop culture to my everyday life. the possibilities are endless here! :))

Who are your favourite designers, and why?
marc jacobs! because he is just divine. his designs are always carefully thought-out. very very amazing. i would kill to have one of his designs!

Do you follow trends? If yes, what is your favourite right now?
not really. actually, i rocked the zipper legging lately eventhough it's pretty out-dated. i guess when you're confident, it trend doesn't really matter.

What do you think will be a big hit/trend in Summer 09?
everyday is summer here. but i guess maxi dress is still happening. it's very chic, easy and flattering on everyone, even on petite like moi :))

If you could go to one show during New York Fashion Week, which show would you go to and why?
marc jacobs. no doubt. because i want to see the magic in flesh!

If you were the fashion police, what would be illegal?
i don't know how it is there, but here in indonesia, a lot of people wore jeans to weddings. i absolutely hate that. it felt so disrespectful. so if i were a fashion police (esp. here) i would ban jeans from weddings!! yay!

What are you favourite stores?
top shop! british fashion at its best! love it!

Do you have any fashion advice for anybody?
the best fashion advice is: be comfortable, be confident and most importantly, be you!!

realization

2009-05-26T16:18:00.003-04:00

"There comes a point in life when you get tired of chasing everyone and trying to fix everything, but it's not giving up. It's realizing that you don't need certain people and the crap that they bring."

I'll see you in my nightmares.

interview with polyvore's Karine Minzon Wilson

2009-05-26T15:48:00.002-04:00

Meet Karine, also known as Karine Minzon Wilson on Polyvore. This beautiful mother has a unique sense of style, and hails from Brazil. I've asked her questions, and she's answered them all! Be sure to check out her sets; you will not be disappointed.

View 'Sets for my friends' on Polyvore

Who is your style icon?
Wow...i have many icons

Actually i love Fergie style, from chic to street she is glamurous!
I love the how fabulous Anne hathaway looked on the red carpet events, she is so chic.
Love Mary-Kate boho chic style
The First lady Michelle Obama is really classy, too!!!!!

Do the sets you make on Polyvore reflect your style in real life?
My style is more basical, jeans with white t-shirt, LBD but i love improve my look with fab heels, amazing bag (im addict on bags), scarf, earrings accessories is very very important for me!

If you had all the money in the world, what is the first thing you'd buy?
bags, bags and more bags....Chanel, LV...

What inspires you when making your sets on Polyvore?
One of my inspiration is my daughter, i love make sets colorful and fun for her!

Who are your favourite designers, and why?
Marc Jacobs - the best for me, a genious the king of cool
Stella McCartney - her clothes are soft and fab
Valentino - the king of elegance

Do you follow trends? If yes, what is your favourite right now? No, i think im not feel pressure to follow trends, but i love news....

What do you think will be a big hit/trend in Summer 09?
one shoulder dress will be a hit too - too keep you cool yet sexy
bright sunglasses
sailor shorts

If you could go to one show during New York Fashion Week, which show would you go to and why?
Marc jacobs, no doubt because he is my fave

If you were the fashion police, what would be illegal?
crocks, uggs with sweatpants , overweight woman wearing tight tops, fur...

What are you favourite stores?
marc jacobs, ralph lauren, juicy couture, lacoste, chanel, coach, calvin klein, DKNY, LV, gucci, fendi, prada.... I have my favorite budget stores:true religion, forever21, zara, urban outfiter, nine west

Do you have any fashion advice for anybody?

- First and more important: Be yourself

- Every woman should own a perfect black dress.

- don’t 't be afraid to try new styles or wear an eclectic mix of clothes and accessories.

- sphash of color is fabulous: The neutral tones act as a base from which the splash of colour really shines.

-baggy clothes may be comfortable but they're never stylish.

interview with polyvore's MyChanel

2009-05-25T17:52:00.002-04:00

Meet Gail, also known as MyChanel on Polyvore. I've asked her some questions, and she's answered all of them! Be sure to check this interview out, as it is very inspiring and interesting, and as well as her sets! They are just stunning!

View 'MyChanel Style' on Polyvore

Who is your style icon?
When I was 12 or 13 I read Gabrielle Bonheur "Coco" Chanel's biography. From that moment I was forever changed and influenced. Not only by fashion, but by her independence and entrepreneurial spirit. As she said, "Simplicity is the keynote of all true elegance."

Do the sets you make on Polyvore reflect your style in real life?
I have nearly 900 sets some good, some bad, but they all reflect my real life style and what I love.

If you had all the money in the world, what is the first thing you'd buy?
A beautiful pair of shoes in Paris!

What inspires you when making your sets on Polyvore?
I am inspired by the texture, style and fabulousness of an item I find, whether it a blouse, jacket or dress.

Who are your favourite designers, and why?
Karl Lagerfeld has done a phenomenal job with CHANEL, every season I fall in love again. Did you know that when he accepted the position of Head Designer, everyone considered the brand to be "dead" and thought him crazy to take it on.

This is a great interview with Karl. http://tiny.cc/WyaBq

Also, Balmain and Alexander Wang have really made a huge impact on my style lately. Rock chic with classic undertones. Even if $3,000 for a pair of jeans is mind-boggling.

Do you follow trends? If yes, what is your favourite right now?
Lots of worn denim, jeans and shorts. I love mixing them with classic pieces to dress them up, like a silk blouse or blazer.

What do you think will be a big hit/trend in Summer 09?
Dresses and cardigan sweaters..ala Michelle Obama.

If you could go to one show during New York Fashion Week, which show would you go to and why?
That would be cruel & unusual punishment to only see one don't you think. But, I wouldn't miss Oscar De La Renta, pure elegance and class.

If you were the fashion police, what would be illegal?
Polyester, birkenstocks, and tube tops.

What are you favourite stores?
Holt Renfrew, Club Monaco, J. Crew, Banana Republic, Zara, H&M and Winners.

Do you consider yourself a fashionable person for your age?
Absolutely.

Do you have any fashion advice for anybody?
Always invest in good quality shoes. Don't be cheap to your feet. Good shoes fit better, are kind to your toes, and always make any outfit look more expensive.

designer spotlight: mikhael kale

2009-05-24T21:23:00.002-04:00

If you don't know already, I am based in Canada, and I live near Toronto. I just wanted to showcase a very creative and beautiful designer who has innovative ideas, who is also from Toronto!

Mikhael Kale is a Toronto based designer whose label is only in its second year, but is working up a storm. He has a profile that many veteran desginers strive for such as floor space at Holt Renfrew, notices in Nylon magazine and an off-site presentation at New York Fashion Week this Spring.

Here is an interview excerpt taken from blogTO's Designer Files:

How did you get into fashion?
Funny, I never 'got' into fashion, it got into me. I have always been drawn to garment design and construction.

When did you start sewing?
Age 10.

Canada isn't known as a fashion Mecca and a lot of talent goes overseas. You studied in London. What's the hardest part about doing business out of Toronto, and why do you stay?
I came back to start a label in Toronto. Proximity is always an issue no matter where I am located. As for fashion and talent, there is so much harvested in Canada.

Do you have a muse?
Um... er... um... ask anyone who knows me, and they'd tell you; I'm in love with a new woman hourly. I just simply find every woman muse-worthy. Every woman is the Mikhael Kale woman, case in point.

And another taken from the May 2009 issue of Elle Canada magazine:

You're the fashion police. What do you ban?
"I've banned things like purple tights with flat pointy shoes, but then I see M.I.A. wearing them, looking incredible, so I stand corrected! It's all about having a sense of self. Fashion isn't about boundaries."

What's your favourite food?
"I have this obsession with dried dates and dry-roasted peanuts. If you mush them together, it tastes like a Mars bar!"

Who's your favourite designer?
"Madame Grès. She was incredible."

To find out more about this amazing "Torontonian", please visit his website at http://mikhaelkale.com

interview with polyvore's ℓovepeacejoy

2009-05-24T21:09:00.003-04:00

Meet Olivia, also known as ℓovepeacejoy on Polyvore. I've asked her a few questions, and she's willingly answered them! Be sure to check her out - her sets are amazing!

View 'Random sets you should check out!' on Polyvore

Who is your style icon?
Hmm... I really love Mary-Kate Olsens sense of style. I guess she's one, and probably Kate Moss. I like the badass look :]

Do the sets you make on Polyvore reflect your style in real life?
I'm more of a jeans-and-tee kind of girl. My Polyvore style most definitely doesn't represent how I dress in real-life. I wear basic outfits, and on Polyvore my outfits are more outrageous and fun. I wish I dressed as well as my sets.

If you had all the money in the world, what is the first thing you'd buy?
The first thing I'd buy would be a Balenciaga bag. I love their bags ;]

What inspires you when making your sets on Polyvore?
My inspiration comes from random things I see and hear. Like, if I see a pattern in a rug, I try to bring it out in my sets. I also get inspiration from random items on Polyvore. If I see a bracelet I like, I try to make a set that would fit it.

Who are your favourite designers, and why?
I love Christian Louboutin. His designs are always crisp and the signature red soles are super cool. I also LOVE Marc Jacobs. He's never afraid to create a daring pattern using wild colors.

Do you follow trends? If yes, what is your favourite right now?
Yes, I do. The trend I am currently obsessed with are gladiator shoes. Everywhere I go, I always point out the gladiator shoes for sale. I actually just bought another pair :] I also love using them in my sets.

What do you think will be a big hit/trend in Summer 09?
I think Maxi dresses will be a big trend, if they aren't already. They are pretty versatile and most of the times made with nice and airy material. I know I'm going to buy myself one or two.

If you could go to one show during New York Fashion Week, which show would you go to and why?
Marc Jacobs for sure. I love him and I love his clothes. Being able to see the outfits on the runway would be great!

If you were the fashion police, what would be illegal?
Oh there are so many things I'd make illegal! Shoes with socks to me is a big fashion no-no. I'd also take out cropped army pants. When I see people on the street just wearing them I want to scream! Lol. Last but not least, lost peasant skirts. What a catastrophe :D

What are you favourite stores?
I love topshop. Their clothes can match any personality. Too bad I don't live where there are any of their stores.

Do you consider yourself a fashionable person for your age?
I do. I may not wear super amazing clothes, but I always make sure to wear something stylish.

Do you have any fashion advice for anybody?
Don't just dress to impress people. Dress to please yourself, thats all that matters. Labels don't matter either. Whether you shop designer or thrift, the outcome can always be the same.

RULE NUMBER ELEVEN

2009-05-23T23:00:00.000-04:00

#11: YOUR DREAMS CAN BECOME REALITY IF YOU ONLY LET IT.

thanks, polyfriends

2009-05-23T22:55:00.002-04:00

MissEhhh:
How does the way you dress in real life compare to the sets you make on polyvore?
To be honest, it doesn't. I use alot of skirts and heels (especially gladiator ones) in my sets, and I don't dress like that at all in real life. I'm a jeans and tee kind of girl in real life. But the sets I make is what I personally like and I would definitely wear it if given the chance.

PrincessMia:
Who's your main source of style inspiration?
Many fashion bloggers. They have such great style, just check on lookbook and whatiworetoday2 on Livejournal! Aside from anyone not famous, I'd go with Rachel Bilson, Mischa Barton and Mary-Kate Olsen.

Find me on Polyvore

what was that, you say

2009-05-23T16:39:00.001-04:00

What are things you have learned in your life?

RULE NUMBER TEN

2009-05-20T17:29:00.002-04:00

#10: REALIZE A GOOD THING BEFORE IT LEAVES.

RULE NUMBER NINE

2009-05-18T13:07:00.001-04:00

#9: LIFE'S LIKE AN HOURGLASS GLUED TO THE TABLE. DON'T WASTE TIME.

who is to say

2009-05-16T17:41:00.001-04:00

cause nobody wants you like i do

listen to my voice, it's my disguise

2009-05-15T19:10:00.003-04:00

inspiration post number 2: latin phrases

alis grave nil - nothing is too heavy to those who have wings
alis volat propriis - she flies with her own wings
carpe noctem - seize the night
dum vita est, spes est - while there is life, there is hope
luceat lux vestra - let your light shine
non ducor duco - i am not led; i lead
semper ad meliora - always towards better things
veni, vidi, vici - i came, i saw, i conquered
vive ut vivas - live so that you may live
aut viam inveniam aut faciam - either i will find a way or make one

save my life

2009-05-15T18:25:00.003-04:00

all images belong to their rightful owners

RULE NUMBER EIGHT

2009-05-12T18:11:00.002-04:00

#8: DON'T BE AFRAID OF BEING ALONE, BECAUSE WHEN EVERYONE WALKS AWAY, YOU'LL BE BY YOURSELF ANYWAY.

RULE NUMBER SEVEN

2009-05-10T14:31:00.000-04:00

#7: HAVE FAITH.

RULE NUMBER SIX

2009-05-10T00:49:00.003-04:00

#6: IF IT TAKES A LEAP OF FAITH, THEN SO BE IT. TAKE THAT LEAP OF FAITH.

RULE NUMBER FIVE

2009-05-07T21:26:00.002-04:00

#5: DON'T FOCUS SO MUCH ON FATE AND DESTINY - IT WILL HAPPEN AND YOU WON'T EVEN KNOW IT. HERE, TAKE YOUR LIFE. DO WITH IT WHAT YOU WILL.

please visit

2009-05-03T12:55:00.001-04:00

this website. It is truly heart-warming and touching.

RULE NUMBER FOUR

2009-05-02T15:55:00.000-04:00

#4: BE YOUR OWN HERO.

inherited scars

2009-05-01T19:11:00.001-04:00

If I could have said this to your face maybe you wouldn't have to write like I do,
Except I use paper instead of my body now; it's something you might want to try too.

-Sage Francis

RULE NUMBER THREE

2009-05-01T17:54:00.001-04:00

#3: YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. DON'T LET ANYONE TELL YOU OTHERWISE.

if you've got problems, why don't you go and solve them?

2009-04-25T21:35:00.006-04:00

Mixed lyrics featuring Kings of Leon, Jimmy Eat World, Coldplay, Charlotte Sometimes, Guster, Bright Eyes, Noah and the Whale, Death Cab For Cutie, Linkin Park, The Motorhomes, Lifehouse, City And Colour, Kelly Clarkson, The Bravery

Told me you love me, that I'd never die alone
Keep my heart somewhere drugs don't go
So what would you think of me now?
Now my feet won't touch the ground

Painted faces fill the places I can't reach
I'm awake and I've been losing sleep
There are bones to bury and bones to find
I am the watch you always wear but forget to wind

I nearly ruined it by saying I love you
But you don't know what now to do
So if you're asking me I want you to know
When you're alone, carry on

You still my heart, you take my breath away
That I'lI never find the words to say
Keep your head in my hand and heart on your sleeve
I wonder, do you still think of me

RULE NUMBER TWO

2009-04-25T21:28:00.002-04:00

#2: EVERY SECOND COUNTS.

RULE NUMBER ONE

2009-04-24T23:59:00.002-04:00

#1: SHAPE YOUR WORLD, OR SOMEONE ELSE WILL.

i tried

2009-04-14T22:45:00.000-04:00

I always tried to believe in the saying, "If you're getting better, you can't get any worse."

... I got better, and now I'm falling apart again.

All I can do is pray to God.
Pray to God that He helps me.

All I can do is sit and watch.
Sit and watch as I get torn into pieces I never thought possible.

Help me, Jesus

guernica

2009-04-13T21:00:00.001-04:00

Ever since I was young,
your word is the word that always won.
Worry and wake the ones you love.
A phone call I'd rather not receive.
Please use my body while I sleep.
My lungs are fresh and yours to keep,
Kept clean and they will let you breathe.

Is this the way a toy feels when its batteries run dry?
I am the watch you always wear but you forget to wind.

Nobody plans to be half a world away at times like these,
so I sat alone and waited out the night.
The best part of what has happened was the part I must have missed.
So I'm asking you to shine it on and stick around.
I'm not writing my goodbyes.

I submit no excuse.
If this is what I have to do I owe you every day I wake.
If I could I would shrink myself and sink through your skin to your blood cells
and remove whatever makes you hurt but I am too weak to be your cure.

Is this the way a toy feels when its batteries run dry?
I am the watch you always wear but you forget to wind.

Nobody plans to be half a world away at times like these,
so I sat alone and waited out the night.
The best part of what has happened was the part I must have missed.
So I'm asking you to shine it on and stick around.
I'm not writing my goodbyes.

I'm not letting you check out.
You will beat this starting now and you will always be around.
I'm there to monitor your breathing
I will watch you while you're sleeping.
I will keep you safe and sound.
Does anybody remember back when you were very young.
Did you ever think that you would be this blessed?

Nobody plans to be half a world away at times like these,
so I sat alone and waited out the night.
The best part of what has happened was the part I must have missed.
So I'm asking you to shine it on and stick around.
I'm not writing my goodbyes.

peaceful and deep

2009-04-13T20:52:00.002-04:00

when you're in a pit,
dug deep, down there
hurt and alone
with no one to hold

when there's nobody else
that you can think of
who will bother to come
and save you from your misery

remember that God is with you always

it never hurts to remember that
and you've nothing to lose...

happy easter

2009-04-12T17:03:00.000-04:00

Happy Easter, to all of you who celebrate it.
I hope you guys went to church.

If you don't celebrate the event,
then Happy Sunday to you, I guess.

i don't want to love you

2009-04-11T13:13:00.001-04:00

So I don't want to love you, 'cause see it used to be that the word love could pump the breaks on a conversation and leave someone feeling utterly speechless. Now, it's used to fill breaks in a conversation and pump reason back into why you can't leave someone who's making you feel utterly useless.

you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

2009-04-06T18:38:00.002-04:00

Do you ever feel like you're working for something you're never going to get?
It's like a shoot and miss kind of deal.
But you still keep trying, and trying, and trying?
Each time, you try harder just to get a step closer.
Even though you know you're only taking a step further, you still try?

... Yeah, that's me everyday.

there's always some reason

2009-04-05T20:43:00.001-04:00

To feel not good enough...