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Saturday, December 26, 2009

one step at a time.

you don't love her.

for crying out loud, you haven't been dating the girl for more than what, twenty four hours? so hell no, you don't fucking love her.

you like her. and you've liked her for what, a total of two weeks or something? more or less, who knows, because you don't tell me these things anymore.

so what, i'm quick to judge. who wouldn't judge a relationship that's only lasted about a day and the partners are already saying 'i love you' to each other when they didn't even know each other really existed until about, oh, i don't know, three weeks ago?

you've known each other for four months. i get it. you've liked her for a week or two. i get it. you made your relationship official on christmas day. i get it. and you love her. i don't get it.

whatever, your heart feels what it feels but this, my friend, isn't love. this is what i hate about relationships and why i can understand so many older people call teenagers immature and incapable of being in 'true love' or relationships. because there are certain people who just blurt out 'i love you' for the sake of having something to say, of having something to prove that the relationship is working and going somewhere and will continue to go somewhere.

you can last a whole month without those three words slipping out of your month, i'll tell you that.

don't say it if you don't mean it. you might think you do, but you just like her. a lot. and this whole 'i love her' thing isn't flying. i'm not getting my head around it just yet because you know what? it doesn't make sense to me.

and sure, i sound harsh and i sound like a fucking bitch and i sound judgmental as hell. well, maybe because i am. i'm your best friend, i'm not your fucking shrink. i'm your reality check when you need it. i tell you my opinion when you ask for it. i give you advice when you want it.

i'm not your maid or your fucking mistress who's going to pat you on the back and hand you tissues. though that sounds like the perfect best friend, it isn't. i'm just trying to understand you right now because i haven't been understanding you for the past three weeks.

i know everything last. i find out everything from unimportant and irrelevant resources. i only find out from you once i ask you.

and this might sound hypocritical because of my last post, but these things are really nothing to hide because we see each other almost everyday and you know i'm bound to find out. and if one day, something horrible travels around and i hear word of it from another unimportant and irrelevant source, i really don't know what i'll do.

so yeah, i don't get it. i don't get you right now.

that's all.

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